So, let's pretend you have a Saturday afternoon. One in the middle of a holiday weekend. You're looking around prior to the weekend begining and say to yourself. "Self, I think we should plan something unique for this weekend."
At which time Self would repsond, "Yourself, I do believe you have a plan there."
Now, take all those wonderful, fun, exciting plans...and toss 'em out the window as you realize that you have locked your keys in the car, it's now Friday night and the car alarm fob decides to stop working and won't unlock the door. Oh, did I mention that it's 10pm at night...and you're in a rather large parking lot? And you're not within walking distance of home. And your kids are a)back in Boston, b) at the Dodger game, c) watching the Dodger game at home, and/or d) driving up to San Luis Obsibo for the weekend with old college buddies.
Ya. a-d. All 4 possiblities. All 4 kids. Busy. And no matter how you point that fob, or spin it around, it's not going to work. Not.one.little.bit. Bless the son who arrives in the MIDDLE OF HIS BELOVED DODGER GAME to rescue her. (Did I mention that the son is a HUGE, and here I'm talking, HUGE Dodger fan? Testament to the good son that he is, he came right away.
While waiting, it was far too dark to knit lace and I couldn't find a way to balance my book light. So I pulled out a book. A simple diversion to the fact that the next Debbie Macomber book isn't out in paperbook yet, so we resorted to this one.
Granted, there's been the word 'knit' in it twice, but not a central part of the story line.
Granted, there's been the word 'knit' in it twice, but not a central part of the story line. Son arrived, picked up Mom and we drove home with the latest of girl stories along the way. (I love these times! And yes, I know I have to finish the driving trip accounts. Soon..very soon!)
Baby daughter calls home later with more advice for Mom. Baby daughter is a mechanical wiz. She starts to quiz Mom about the possibilites keeping the keys in said car. And Mom away from said car. We agree that it's time to call in a night and plan on calling the alarm company first thing in the am to 'fix' the situation. Oh, ya, and it might be time to get a second copy of the only key to the car made. Ya. She's a smart girl. (I know I know...procrastination...I'm really good at that.)
Scene, two...(or really is it up to three or four by now?)
1) Wake up early Saturday morning and watch the clock ticking away...so calls to the alarm company can commense. Waiting...waiting...waiting...ding it's time...
2) Start leaving phone calls on the 1-800 and local numbers provided with alarm company paperwork. Notice that the pre-recorded messages at said alarm company says they return phone calls DAILY from 8-5pm. Notice that it's 8:03 am. Ok...maybe they're listening to their morning phone messages and will return messages shortly. Keep waiting.
3) Divert attention away from being carless. Turn on computer and read e-mails.
4) Pull out purple baby blanket and knit.
5) Put down purple baby blanket before making too many mistakes.
6) Start calling son to decide when you can go back to pick up car once alarm company comes to your rescue.
7) Leave 3453490 messages for son since he's not answering his cell phone.
8) Leave more messages for the alarm company and write a blog just before 11am. You just KNOW they HAVE to be a great company and they WILL answer their phones soon. After all, it's a Holiday weekend and they would WANT to respect the fact they are your prefered alarm company. Heaven knows if the car had been stolen, they surely would be at your beck and call and get the car back asap and in great condition. RIGHT?
9) 1:30pm. Still leaving messages for alarm company and son. Nothing is returned.
10) Start to panic now. Holiday weekend and no car.
10) Start to panic now. Holiday weekend and no car.
11) Tell Self and Yourself...shush up. You're adults now and can't freak out.
12) Call the dealership and tell them. HEY! You picked this company, I need help, I need my car...tell me what to do!
13) Hear the Service Manager (after 3 phone calls in their system) tell you that you're still covered in the bumper to bumper warrenty and their roadside assistance should be able to unlock the door for you.
14) DOH! Ya, like they could have had this done and over with last night. LAST FREAKIN' NIGHT! (don't tell son. He missed his baseball game)
15) Call son, have his step mom wake him up...tell groggy son, 'Hey, kiddo! Time to go!"
"huh?" he says very slowly....."what are you talking about?"
"Kiddo, we have to go get my car, they're going to meet us there."
"huh? why now?"
"Uh, cuz it's 1:30pm and it's time to get going."
"oh, ok. Be right there."
16) Half way to the car, call road side assistance. They already gave you the directions on what to do when you're at the car. They now tell you they can't find your file. You apparently don't exist now in their files. They'll have to create a new one. No biggie they say. They'll send someone out immediately. and Please answer your cell phone when they get close to double check on the destination.
17) Arrive at car. Send son home. Good son. No need to stay, they'll be here very shortly. Look around at miles and miles of seamingly endless parked cars as far as the eye can see. Cars. No tow truck guy.
18) After 15 mins, notice that 'sunny Southern California' is very windy today, and you didn't bring a sweater after reading emails about the rest of the country being overly warm and in the 90's.
19) Start shivering and call the tow truck company. Oh, he's going to be there in 45 mins. They say. Pull out knitting,
and snacks, 
and lean on the now very dirty bumper of the car 
and watch the wind 'help' unwind the yarn.
and snacks, 
and lean on the now very dirty bumper of the car 
and watch the wind 'help' unwind the yarn. 20) Make a note that next time...bring a lawn chair. Try the alarm fob again. Nope, still not working.
21) The tow truck company call and ask if you can see the guy. No. Well, he's in lot B. But I'm in lot C. Wait some more.
22) Tow truck guy comes. HORRAY! He's going to save the day! Wait...he's using a glorified coat hanger? That keeps flipping around the inside of the car? This could take a bit of time. Pull out knitting. Decide not to lean on your car to make it move from his 'delicate' surgical postion of the 'coat hanger' and lean on car next to yours. Try not to lean on the bird poop
or the wad of gum
that seems to want to follow your feet.
or the wad of gum
that seems to want to follow your feet. 23) 24 minutes later, the door is open. Yes, 24 minutes. Makes you think that your car is really safe if it takes that long to 'break into' it. Then laugh when you think that a teenager could break into it in a matter of seconds. Yet.... All the doors are opened! Success!
And.both.alarm.fobs.are.suddenly.working. Both.......not.a.thing.wrong.with.them. As the alarm guys drives off. No apparent reason for it not working. None, Whatsoever.
24) Get in the car, text the kids that the car is opened and everythings ok.
25) Get on the freeway. Pull to a halt. Stopped freeway. This is LA afterall. Totally stopped.
26) Finally get home, 20 hours after you realized you can't get the car door opened. Go to have a sit down and relax a bit. Pull out purple baby blanket.
27) Tink back 7 rows of lace pattern in purple baby blanket. You've skipped a YO somehow and no matter what you do, you can't get it fixed.
Figures. Yep. Long weekend.
The Yarn Harlot might just have the right idea. She just pulled her bike out for the summer.
Oh, the lessons learned? Possibly, have a second key for your car..and mostly..don't lock your keys in the car. And pre-program your cell phone with roadside assistance numbers. Oh, maybe KNOW you HAVE roadside assistance. Ya, I'm going with the 'don't lock your keys in the car' one first.
